pretending

Dear today...

i spent all of you pretending i'm ok when i'm not
pretending i'm happy when i'm not
pretending about everything to everyone

and

to whom i wish to speculate?
dont let the answer says tears no more....

i'm too exhausted....
too afraid...

empty

why does it feels like i refuse to believe anyone today?
does something bleeding inside me?

girls never hav the guts...

being guilty.....

why does it feels like killing

own desire to smile

in the crowded of clown

how suffocating

annoying

to her self

but i'm sorry

final decision means no turning back

pray for miracle

if the wishes still need to be grab

but never believe cause

miracle have their own reasons

to be called miracle

feeling of guilty

feeling of sorry

for the purpose of my own freedom

this time..there's heart

need to be hurt

no worries

it'll heal

through the whisper of your own regretting

cause learning is a way better than forgetting

p/s : a lil light will do...dear friend.. we are still friend..arent we?

i can see it now..the monster,when i talk to the mirror..the ghost,

Help

i have done it again

taken truth out of context

taken lies out of you

replaced settling dust with

some white lies which sound dark now

what am i asking for

from emptiness

and do all lonely roads

lead to gain

does wordless music

really fill you with thought?

and does writing show you

faces on papers?

all rhythms come from

the original heartbeat

i'm sorry this is the reality

you need to notice

this is not new

this is of the beginning